[cliffordsndrs451]

I suppose this is the best place to seek any input. I was saved during an old fashioned revival meeting on a Friday night in April 1974. I have been weak, shattered, and discouraged many times since then. Highlights were 3 years in a strong fundamental seminary, assistant Pastor in a Faith based Baptist Church, and a beginning jail (not prison) ministry. That's all gone now as are 2 previous marriages. My father and very close brother have died without Christ - my brother went into intensive care on Christmas day and died within 2 weeks this year.

I am unequally yoked with 5 children I deeply love. Two children with my first wife, who I raised until they moved out on their own, an adopted son 16, a christian son (9) and my loving daughter (5). Unfortunately, I only get 6 or 7 days at home each month due to severe job travel requirements which I am in deep prayer to get changed.

Due to this extensive travel, I feel like I'm losing any witness I can have. I can change jobs but nothing abrupt because my wife cannot work. We have a large extended family that is also supported and tonight I heard that her mother is also deathly ill. Her mom and dad lived with us for extended times on 3 separate occasions and it looks like the Lord will lead that way again.

God has been unbelievably merciful in my life and dealt with me with more grace than I ever could have conceived of. I am sure that I am only an insignificant vessel of earth or clay but I never give up trying to purge and draw nigh. It was wonderful to find a forum like this. I am not sure how many times I will be able to log on but hope to continue.

By the Grace of God, I hope that in some quiet time alone with God, when any of you finish with the important prayers and wrestled with God for His help in your lives, that you might send a vapor to the thrown room for me. I can use all the help I can get. God bless every one of you and thanks.

Love from the heart,

Cliff

[Kiwi Christian]

Well brother, we've all got a different story to tell, but praise God we've got the same Lord and Saviour over all, amen.

I hope and pray that your life circumstances will improve and that God will answer your prayers, that His will be done.

Welcome to these forums Cliff, may you be edified and encouraged through them.

[tonybones2112]

Originally Posted by cliffordsndrs451

I suppose this is the best place to seek any input. I was saved during an old fashioned revival meeting on a Friday night in April 1974. I have been weak, shattered, and discouraged many times since then. Highlights were 3 years in a strong fundamental seminary, assistant Pastor in a Faith based Baptist Church, and a beginning jail (not prison) ministry. That's all gone now as are 2 previous marriages. My father and very close brother have died without Christ - my brother went into intensive care on Christmas day and died within 2 weeks this year.

I am unequally yoked with 5 children I deeply love. Two children with my first wife, who I raised until they moved out on their own, an adopted son 16, a christian son (9) and my loving daughter (5). Unfortunately, I only get 6 or 7 days at home each month due to severe job travel requirements which I am in deep prayer to get changed.

Due to this extensive travel, I feel like I'm losing any witness I can have. I can change jobs but nothing abrupt because my wife cannot work. We have a large extended family that is also supported and tonight I heard that her mother is also deathly ill. Her mom and dad lived with us for extended times on 3 separate occasions and it looks like the Lord will lead that way again.

God has been unbelievably merciful in my life and dealt with me with more grace than I ever could have conceived of. I am sure that I am only an insignificant vessel of earth or clay but I never give up trying to purge and draw nigh. It was wonderful to find a forum like this. I am not sure how many times I will be able to log on but hope to continue.

By the Grace of God, I hope that in some quiet time alone with God, when any of you finish with the important prayers and wrestled with God for His help in your lives, that you might send a vapor to the thrown room for me. I can use all the help I can get. God bless every one of you and thanks.

Love from the heart,

Cliff

Cliff, perhaps this is hard to understand, perhaps you are a greater witness than you think you are. Maybe by glorying in your infirmities you might see clearer. We see through a glass darkly but then face to face, I know you are not where you think you should be, beg God to tell you where you need to be and beg Him to place you there.

I'l pray for you and hope to hear more from you as your time allows. He is risen, brother.

Grace and peace

Tony

[Brother Jerry]

You have my prayers.

Pray to the Lord as often as possible; let it pour completely out unto the King of Kings and Lord or Lords; The first and the last; the beginning and end; Jesus Christ, the same yesterday, the same today, the same forever.

Lift up your head brother.

We are more than conquerors.

[cliffordsndrs451]

Thanks for your response and input. It's all a great encouragement. Lord willing, I will keep you posted. I had forgotten about the Isaiah verse - thank you.

Cliff

[Hayseed]

Welcome Brother.
Iam deeply moved by your introduction and shall spend time in prayer over you.
May God bless you and yours richly.

Mrs Hayseed

[chette777]

Cliff,
Welcome to the forum and we will all be praying for you.

[Rolando]

Although I'm haven't been here for long, I welcome you to this wonderful forum. I feel deeply moved by your introduction because I myself have relatives on their way to Hell. I fear my parents, my brother, and most of my family are going there. Thought I hate to think about this, one of my grandfathers (whom I loved as a child) is almost assuredly there. I thank the LORD God for having saved me. I'll pray for you brother.

[Winman]

Hang in there Cliff and welcome to the forums. And do not be discouraged, you may be doing more for the Lord than you realize. You know, the closer we get to God, the worse we look and seem ourselves. I have always been comforted by Paul's words in Romans.

Rom 7:24 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?

I am astounded by this verse. If one of God's greatest servants saw himself as a wretched sinner, then no doubt we shall too.

I think we all go through this. Back in February, I had to go down to Florida as my Dad passed away. There was much to do with a funeral service, and myself and my two brothers had to completely clear everything out of my Dad's home. Man, it is amazing what an 80 year old man can accumulate, it took us three full days to pack everything.

But I have been praying for my Dad for years. He was not an atheist, he always expressed a belief in God, and I remember him clearly saying that God was good to him and often helped him when I was a boy. But he was not religious, never attended church, never read the Bible or spoke of Christ. He was raised Methodist as a boy, which was a pretty good church back then.

I did invite him to come see an evangelist many years ago, and even convinced him to go down at the invitation. When he came back I asked if he had received Christ and he said that he "thought" he had done that before.

I didn't know how to take that really. It gave me hope that he had received Christ at an earlier time, but it really wasn't the kind of statement that gives you assurance and certainty. So I continued to worry and pray for him for many years.

And it was difficult to speak of Christ to him, he really did not like to discuss religion whatsoever. As he got older he became more tempermental which made it even more difficult. Then the last year as his health really began to deteriorate, I prayed more and more for him.

He passed away suddenly. My older brother had actually called me that morning and told me Dad was recovering very well and getting stronger every day. This filled me with hope that I still had time to witness to him. Then that very evening my brother called back and said Dad was gone.

You know, I went over everything. Did I try hard enough? Could I have done more?

And then when my brothers and I were packing, my brother handed me a letter I had mailed my Dad back in the 80s. I had long forgotten about this letter. I opened it and read. I had written about 5 or 6 pages in detail explaining to my Dad that we were all sinners, that Jesus had come and died or us, taking our sins upon himself, and rising from the dead. There was even a very good salvation tract inside. I pleaded with my Dad, as I loved him very much and wanted him to be saved.

And then, a day later we visited a neighbor who I have not seen in over 20 years. Now this man was a good Christian who used to always talk to me of Christ when I was young. He is in his mid 70s now, but still in good health. Well, he told me something again I had completely forgotten, that I had led his son to the Lord many years ago. I said "I did?" He said, "Yes, and he still talks about you all the time."

This is not about me. I am not nearly the Christian I should be, and I have been very convicted about that lately. But I told you this story so that you might not be so discouraged. You may have done more for Jesus than you realize. You may or may not find out about it in this life, but you surely will in the next.

So, just do what you can. I used to be a saleman years ago and travelled alot. I used to carry Bible tracts and leave them everywhere. I have no idea if folks got saved from them, but I surely hope so.

Sorry for the long post, and once again Welcome to the forum.

[peopleoftheway]

Originally Posted by Winman

Hang in there Cliff and welcome to the forums. And do not be discouraged, you may be doing more for the Lord than you realize. You know, the closer we get to God, the worse we look and seem ourselves. I have always been comforted by Paul's words in Romans.

Rom 7:24 O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death?

I am astounded by this verse. If one of God's greatest servants saw himself as a wretched sinner, then no doubt we shall too.

I think we all go through this. Back in February, I had to go down to Florida as my Dad passed away. There was much to do with a funeral service, and myself and my two brothers had to completely clear everything out of my Dad's home. Man, it is amazing what an 80 year old man can accumulate, it took us three full days to pack everything.

But I have been praying for my Dad for years. He was not an atheist, he always expressed a belief in God, and I remember him clearly saying that God was good to him and often helped him when I was a boy. But he was not religious, never attended church, never read the Bible or spoke of Christ. He was raised Methodist as a boy, which was a pretty good church back then.

I did invite him to come see an evangelist many years ago, and even convinced him to go down at the invitation. When he came back I asked if he had received Christ and he said that he "thought" he had done that before.

I didn't know how to take that really. It gave me hope that he had received Christ at an earlier time, but it really wasn't the kind of statement that gives you assurance and certainty. So I continued to worry and pray for him for many years.

And it was difficult to speak of Christ to him, he really did not like to discuss religion whatsoever. As he got older he became more tempermental which made it even more difficult. Then the last year as his health really began to deteriorate, I prayed more and more for him.

He passed away suddenly. My older brother had actually called me that morning and told me Dad was recovering very well and getting stronger every day. This filled me with hope that I still had time to witness to him. Then that very evening my brother called back and said Dad was gone.

You know, I went over everything. Did I try hard enough? Could I have done more?

And then when my brothers and I were packing, my brother handed me a letter I had mailed my Dad back in the 80s. I had long forgotten about this letter. I opened it and read. I had written about 5 or 6 pages in detail explaining to my Dad that we were all sinners, that Jesus had come and died or us, taking our sins upon himself, and rising from the dead. There was even a very good salvation tract inside. I pleaded with my Dad, as I loved him very much and wanted him to be saved.

And then, a day later we visited a neighbor who I have not seen in over 20 years. Now this man was a good Christian who used to always talk to me of Christ when I was young. He is in his mid 70s now, but still in good health. Well, he told me something again I had completely forgotten, that I had led his son to the Lord many years ago. I said "I did?" He said, "Yes, and he still talks about you all the time."

This is not about me. I am not nearly the Christian I should be, and I have been very convicted about that lately. But I told you this story so that you might not be so discouraged. You may have done more for Jesus than you realize. You may or may not find out about it in this life, but you surely will in the next.

So, just do what you can. I used to be a saleman years ago and travelled alot. I used to carry Bible tracts and leave them everywhere. I have no idea if folks got saved from them, but I surely hope so.

Sorry for the long post, and once again Welcome to the forum.

Amen Brother Winman Amen!

And welcome to the Forum Clifford, as Brother Winman so wonderfully demonstrated our witness is not what we think we have done, but what the Lord KNOWS we have done but have not had realised within us, and I am confident that when we are Before our Lord and Saviour at the Judgement seat Of Christ we will have revealed the most wonderful things we never even comprehended here on earth as pleasing to HIM.
God Bless and I shall Pray for your steady walk with the Lord.

Matthew 10:42 And whosoever shall give to drink unto one of these little ones a cup of cold water only in the name of a disciple, verily I say unto you, he shall in no wise lose his reward.