[stephanos]

Originally Posted by chette777

Stephanos are you married?

Nope, but I have a copy of the Holy Bible and a two parents that have made their marriage work. I've also seen numerous couples go through what MrSmith is going through. I've seen how some made it through the difficulties, and how some didn't.

Chette777, your ad hominem is counter productive here. If the words I shared with MrSmith are in error, then please advise. If not...

the point of counseling is to get a mediator. That way they can talk without arguing, screaming, and fighting.

I understand the point of counseling. I'm not completely against it (though I, like Pastor David Peacock, don't think it's a pastors job), I just believe that it might be counter-productive at this point in there relationship.

This is addressed to MrSmith; if you do decide to go ahead with "counceling" perhaps it would be wise to keep it within your home. Have a good Bible believing pastor come to your home for dinner or what have you, and then take it to the couch for a "mediated" discussion.

But you see, here's the issue that I've been trying to get at. MrSmith hasn't been attending church. He doesn't have a strong relationship with a Bible believing pastor at the moment. This is one of the reasons I suggested he get involved in a church. Not only would it allow this sort of relationship to develop, it might just open a future door for his wife to get to know some of the ladies at the church who could help her understand her husband ^_^.

For Jesus' sake,
Stephen

[chette777]

I have read Mr smith's discourse. If Mr Smith is a real person and this is a real situation and not some internet sham. His wife is about to leave him. I have seen this before many times. and if he doesn't do something quickly he will be heart broken. this is about his relationship and his possibility to save it.

I know you have good intentions Stephenos.

But I know the signs and she is on the verge of breaking away from this relationship and it will happen quickly when it happens.

So Mr Smith if you are genuinely serious about saving your marriage there needs to be some give and take here and some very delicate diplomacy on your part to get her to change her heart and get her back on the track to a happy marriage. what you have been sharing tells me your marriage is already pretty much over as far as relationship. in a short time she will be gone physically.

So get right with the Lord, pray earnestly for wisdom,seek out someone in your area for counseling. Internet counseling for you only does no good at this point. If you will let her talk and get it out and see what is happening.

Plus, you have not given us a full picture of what has been going on for the last year or two of this relationship and I believe it goes much deeper than what you have been sharing with us and it began at least a year ago.

We all here will be praying for you.

[stephanos]

Originally Posted by chette777

I have read Mr smith's discourse. If Mr Smith is a real person and this is a real situation and not some internet sham. His wife is about to leave him. I have seen this before many times. and if he doesn't do something quickly he will be heart broken. this is about his relationship and his possibility to save it.

I know you have good intentions Stephenos.

But I know the signs and she is on the verge of breaking away from this relationship and it will happen quickly when it happens.

So Mr Smith if you are genuinely serious about saving your marriage there needs to be some give and take here and some very delicate diplomacy on your part to get her to change her heart and get her back on the track to a happy marriage. what you have been sharing tells me your marriage is already pretty much over as far as relationship. in a short time she will be gone physically.

So get right with the Lord, pray earnestly for wisdom,seek out someone in your area for counseling. Internet counseling for you only does no good at this point. If you will let her talk and get it out and see what is happening.

Plus, you have not given us a full picture of what has been going on for the last year or two of this relationship and I believe it goes much deeper than what you have been sharing with us and it began at least a year ago.

We all here will be praying for you.

Thanks Chette. I to agree with you in your assessment. MrSmith needs to tread prayerfully and carefully from now on.

Peace and Love,
Stephen

Originally Posted by chette777

So get right with the Lord, pray earnestly for wisdom,seek out someone in your area for counseling. Internet counseling for you only does no good at this point.

Good advice, brother Chette!

[MrSmith]

Im a real person, this is no sham. whats a sham???. But anyway.
I have mustard seed faith. actually alot more than that. DONT NOT TAKE THIS AS ME BEING HATEFUL. im not concerned with her leaving. If she leaves its not gonna hurt as bad as you may think. im as tired of her as she may be with me. My thing is following the Lord. Its not my will im looking for, But the Will Of The Lord. I do love her, I will jump in front of a bullet for her, but im never gonna try and keep someone that doesnt want to be there. I will follow the Lords Love guide and if we are to be together, Bless The Lord, and if we arent. Bless The Lord.

I read the word, then speak the word and then praise The Lord in advance for what he's getting ready to do. lately Ive been just seaking Gods way. trying to bridle my tongue. even when I feel shes dead wrong, I treat her like an enemy and show her love and concern. (not thats shes the enemy) this hurts. because i wanna say things that are on my mind, yet if i say anything i feel. It's gonna come back and bite me. whether im right or wrong. my thing is to keep my mouth closed, bless God for his wisdom and understanding and wait on The Lord.

[MrSmith]

Originally Posted by chette777

Plus, you have not given us a full picture of what has been going on for the last year or two of this relationship and I believe it goes much deeper than what you have been sharing with us and it began at least a year ago.

We all here will be praying for you.

you are so right. theres been tones of things going on. but its beginning was in 2000. after my son was born.
everything went down hill from there. first, we didnt know each other more than 3 months before pregnant and then 6 months before marriage. I was a backslider and she hadnt even played on the sliding board. the problems happened when we finally started to get to know one another. we didnt like who we really were. now im sold out for the gospel and its been a war. I aint giving up.

[chette777]

A sham is a fake, false cover, an imposter, a fraud

Originally Posted by MrSmith

My thing is following the Lord. Its not my will im looking for, But the Will Of The Lord. I do love her,

2Cor 7:12 But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.

is God's will for you with her. continue as we will to pray for her. Show her the Love you just shared with us. Love covers a multitude of sin. Get some local help to get you guys communicating correctly

Just give up and take her to a nice place for dinner. Her favorite place preferably.

[MrSmith]

Originally Posted by chette777

Just give up and take her to a nice place for dinner. Her favorite place preferably.

Well how about this? I just found out shes having ANOTHER afair Im not sure of what to do, but I know one thing. Im not gonna let her know I know.

It honestly makes me want to run off. really it does. But I'll continue to praise The Lord whether the situations good or bad.

[chette777]

the only right to divorce is sexual immorality. you have had the right to divorce her since she had her first affair. Get your things in order and get a good Divorce Attorney. If you care for your child get custody of them

[stephanos]

Originally Posted by MrSmith

Well how about this? I just found out shes having ANOTHER afair Im not sure of what to do, but I know one thing. Im not gonna let her know I know.

It honestly makes me want to run off. really it does. But I'll continue to praise The Lord whether the situations good or bad.

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. (Romans 8:28 KJV)

Just keep trusting Jesus, MrSmith.

Concerning her unfaithfulness I'm going to let others comment on this new development. I'd like to encourage you, though, to seek the advice of brothers and sisters who have been through what you're going through. This is why you should be attending a Bible believing church. You're going to need them now more than ever. Also, I'd like to continue to exhort you to keep your nose in God's Word. All of the answers to the struggles you're going through are within its pages.

Your servant in prayer,
Stephen