Another big problem of mine is my obsession with works. I am seeing almost anything as a work. Basically, I have calvinist doctrine, even though I reject calvinism. So here I am praying that God would change me, and fearing actually stepping out and having faith, in case that faith is counted as a work, or it's something that "I do" instead of God. I sometimes feel like I am consigned to sit and wait, and somehow God will just overpower me and I will be in His will forever. The popular resurgence of calvinism online does nothing to help me.
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