[Watchmen]

Hello brothers and sisters! My name is Kurt.

I have wandered and wasted half of my life to glorify my sins. It reaches upon the mountains. I can’t bear to see it for it is so high it almost encloses the very sky. I am deeply ashamed. I have been confused and lost for so long. I have been ignorant for too long. But praise be to Jesus Christ! I am blessed that I found him; otherwise I would have perished under his wrath.

I have lived under a conservative family, I am an Episcopal, and I am very blessed. I have encountered very difficult obstacles in my life as I have been deaf since I was 2 and a half years old. This was very punishing and I held ill will towards myself while blaming God for my hearing loss. I communicate well with others, but I can’t hear the phone or music lyrics as most others do. The internet is a miracle for me, and also a curse for disinformation and distraction. I have been inside private schools all my life. I have graduated from a respective Catholic High School. I graduated from Texas Christian University with a degree in Fine Arts-Photography. Then I wasted time….

At 25, I started being led by the Spirit around 2006. I started asking myself difficult questions about my life. I questioned my existence, my purpose, the future of humanity, and questioned my accomplishments. I was overcome by darkness and thought to myself, ‘all this I have and I have done nothing.’ I trembled at this point. With nowhere to turn to, I grabbed my KJV Bible I had since I was 12. It was so confusing when I was little and it was still confusing at this point! I got angry. I asked my father for an easy, modern day bible. He gave me a Student NIV Bible and I read it beginning 2007. I grew slowly, one by one. While reading this I encountered false christs, false prophets, false doctrines, false churches, false everything- I was trying too hard for the internet to be my guide. I grew more liberal with my ideas, I started thinking in a collective way that we somehow all are part of one source; during this time, I exalted my thinking above God and showed my arrogant, prideful side in front of my family and friends. I started noticing my thinking patterns and by observing my family and friend’s emotional state towards me. This time, I felt even more fearful for my soul, I felt like I was dividing everything, and I was still sinning like everyone else. I broke down alone. I pleaded I knew no better. I lowered myself. I isolated myself.

Some time later, around late 2008, I stumbled into websites such as jesus-is-lord and jesus-is-savior. I researched and noticed articles about new versions. I immediately checked and compared verses with my NIV and KJV. I WAS SHOCKED!!! I quickly researched the translators, articles, different versions of the bibles, and read news not seen in most popular media outlets. I grew slowly in the Spirit with the KJV, and then I started accelerating my learning. Two weeks ago, I stumbled my way into this forum! After checking this site out and reading some deep articles, I just knew this site was right for me. I am glad my heart has led me to this site. I have so many questions to ask!

Currently, my heart still weighs me down; I’m being tempted from the things I still love in the past- it never goes away. This is what I get for getting used to urban life. I realize I can’t change overnight, even with this current knowledge but I’m blessed to know that I can begin to make my ways straighter by listening and sharing with my fellow brothers and sisters whom appear to have a much more delightful, honest, and loving relationship with our Lord Jesus Christ!